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Relationship Coaching
An Alternative to Litigation

For any dispute with ongoing relationships -
family owned businesses, workplaces,
business-to-business, home-owner associations,
even neighbor-to-neighbor....

How did we get here? Do you find yourself in the middle of a confrontation and don’t know how that happened? Are you staying awake at night worrying about a conversation that you are going to have with someone and fearing the worst? Are you mystified about how your most clear and well intentioned communications get twisted and misunderstood?

Sometimes, despite our best intentions, our communication backfires and seems to produce even more misunderstanding and conflict. Very often, this occurs with the people and situations in our lives that we care the most about. 

We have designed “Conscious Communication Coaching,” Relationship Coaching, to assist you to engage in these difficult conversations and achieve the outcomes that you really intended all along. We guide the process so each side deeply "hears" the perspective of the other - focusing on your feelings and needs. The goal is a type of connection where everyone's needs can be met.

Our commitment is to support you in difficult conversations to develop agreement on issues in conflict. We are especially committed to the creation of an environment which is safe, respectful for all sides in the conflict, and conducive to mutual resolution.

How Does Conscious Communication Coaching Work?

Typically we have a separate one or so hour meeting with each party to understand the dispute from his/her perspective. It's also an opportunity to answer questions. Next, everyone gets together for a facilitated group conversation. These sessions are planned to last a maximum of three hours; there can be several of these over several days or weeks depending on the complexity of the dispute.

Drawbacks of Litigation

Litigation is EXPENSIVE! Let's face it, litigation is costly in so many ways. The obvious cost is financial. How much does it cost to retain an attorney? That’s only the beginning; the meter is running…. Many sources suggest to not even attempt to litigate a case when the disputed amount is less than $20,000. And other costs may be even more devastating than the dollars and cents. How much emotional energy will you expend? It gets more and more frustrating as time goes by! And of course, how much time away from work or from family will litigation cost?

Litigation is a Zero-Sum Game(Gain). It’s also called Russian Roulette! It’s the luck of the draw with how the judge or jury will decide your case. In typical court cases there are winners and there are losers. Somebody wins, somebody loses. If a plaintiff sues the defendant for $30,000 the court is asked to "divide the pie." Perhaps the plaintiff wins and gets the whole pie. Perhaps the defendant wins and gets to keep the pie. Perhaps the pie is divided into pieces.... This is called a zero-sum game.

Advantages of Conscious Communication Coaching

Conscious Communication Coaching is Cost Effective. The basic process, as outlined above, may involve just five hours of our time. Even complex situations can typically be resolved with ten to fifteen face-to-face hours. That can be much less expensive than going to court! And the emotional cost is much less than litigation. Do you want to wait a year for your court date (with the anxiety/frustration meter running the entire time)? Or would you rather get together, resolve the issues, and get on with your life and relationship.

Conscious Communication Coaching can be a Postive-Sum Game. A positive-sum game, focusing on needs, where everyone's needs are met, provides the opportunity for everyone to be winners. How can everyone win? By focusing on needs—universal human needs. I recall a recent example (facts altered to maintain confidentiality). Mary rented a one-bedroom apartment but before she moved in a family emergency caused her to require a two-bedroom (that was not available in this complex). Since she never moved in, she wanted her rent back. A court would likely interpret the contract in favor of the landlord; a clear winner and a clear loser. However, getting together outside of court allowed the humanity of the situation to unfold. Empathizing with Mary’s situation, the landlord offered a gift of half a month’s rent. Mary was ecstatic – graciously receiving the sorely needed gift. The landlord was pleased he could provide support. Both sides were winners; a positive-sum game.

And yes, there’s more! Can you imagine courts working towards restoring relationships? Conscious Communication can! Do courts restore good will? Respect? Conscious Communication can! A Conscious Communication conversation gives everyone the opportunity to address the underlying issues and needs that cannot commonly be surface in court

Conscious Communication Coaching Costs.

Contact us for pricing specific to your situation.